You can’t imagine it, the singer remarks. There she was readying for her comeback record in eight years, blissfully happy with her current love, and finally the parent to a young child after facing fertility challenges for a decade, on top of the world. Suddenly in spring she was diagnosed with breast cancer.
The musician, actual name Jessica Cornish, is known for telling it as it is. The LP, the provocatively titled album, was intended as an open book, dealing with every ounce of devastation she’d experienced since she last worked on songs (endometrial issues, miscarriage, failed relationships, emotional abuse, suicidal thoughts) with her usual frankness. The lead track, the song No Secrets, was released in April. But by then there existed a huge secret. The cancer. Then next release, the upbeat Living My Best Life, came out in May and the artist was speaking publicly about how she was living her best life, while still secretly dealing with her cancer. A month later she shared the news, and in early July she received surgical treatment.
She gives me her best “Seriously?” glance. “I come out with a song called No Secrets. I’m conducting every press talk, and they inquire, ‘So what’s new with you?’ and I respond, ‘Uh, nothing really’” the singer has just had to cancel tour dates because she’s still waiting for cosmetic procedures.
We’re at a photo studio in London. She is dressed in a light brown synthetic jacket, blue jeans with ornate white designs, beige footwear and oversized specs. Picture biker chic meets 1970s Nana Mouskouri. “I feel like I’m in the 70s and I should have a partner with a mustache.” Like the film, I say, recalling the film. “They used to call me that!” She smiles. Jessie is quick, unfiltered and blunt. She says she has always been interested in humor and is hoping to make her standup debut next year. “I enjoy humor. During performances I basically roast the fans.”
Personal Battles and News
She was getting ready for an performance at the Baftas when she found a lump. “I quickly sought to get it checked, had an ultrasound, and they said, ‘It appears fine; you’ve got really good dense breast tissue.’ And I responded, ‘However, it’s there. I’ve got an achy arm and tingling in my hands whenever I get up.’ And they replied, ‘How about a biopsy?’ The date was March 28, the day after my birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The specialist told her if it was bad news she’d call on the start of the week. By then she had convinced herself it was fine. The way she describes it, it was just bad timing to get cancer when she had a busy schedule.
“We’re two weeks away from debuting the project after years away and an extended break. And she [the doctor] texted and said, ‘Can you talk at six?’ And I assumed, ‘A video call, likely minor.’ So I jump on the Zoom thinking it’s all going to be fine, and she says, ‘Are you sitting down?.’ That sympathetic voice? And she continues, ‘I’m so, so sorry but your test results have indicated high-grade cancer cells.’” What was your reaction? “I said, ‘Oh, that’s not ideal, is it?. The timing is terrible.’ Immediately I felt was, ‘I have to survive for my boy.’”
I’ve been labeled difficult for knowing myself
She considered the operation terrifying and absurd. “I fear going under. You’re escorted. You know when you have emergency surgery you go on a gurney, but this time I just marched with a medical attire and my bum hanging out. Like a dystopian scene.” But, she adds, she’s been fortunate. No chemotherapy or radiation, just the procedure. “It’s terrible, but you know what? Thank fuck I found it early. I had the mastectomy recently and my right breast now resembles a fruit under fabric.” She smiles again. “I got to keep the nipple, though.”
The next operation is both medical and cosmetic. Her boobs, she remarks, are now “asymmetrical. The implant is larger than before. So inconsiderate! I thought, no need to bully me, I’m already having a hard period. Such disrespect! Ironically I said I’d avoid breast surgery because I’ve got perfectionism, and I know they’d never be flawless. Illness changed that.”
A History of Health Challenges
The singer is no stranger to illness. She believes her attitude toward illness has been so upbeat because she’s used to physical challenges. They have often coincided with peak moments, serving as a tap on the shoulder, or blow, to highlight not to assume everything is fine. “Truly, I feel the universe whispers, ‘You having a good time? Take a seat.’ Ever since I was a child, it has consistently accompanied moments of success for me; something severe or obscure has impacted my body.”
She takes me back to her 11-year-old self, already beginning starring in the London theater in the production (she was selected at the age of 9). That’s when she was diagnosed with the cardiac issue Wolff-Parkinson-White syndrome, which can cause a fast heartbeat as well as dizziness and palpitations. “I was going in and out of rehearsals on an intravenous line, and going back into hospital at night.” She jumps ahead half a dozen years, and 17-year-old Jess has joined the girl group the group while enrolled in the Brit School. “I just got my first record deal, and I had a cerebral event. Then when I was planning to release songs in recently I had a automobile accident and my larynx moved up and I was unable to vocalize for a twelve months.”
Oi, I say, wait, I am overwhelmed. You really had a stroke at 17? She nods|agrees
